Installed New Motion Sensor Lights

My neighbors have been all upset these past couple of weeks. Seems some kids or young adults with nothing better to do have been cruising our street at night and vandalizing cars, mailboxes and yards. So far none of them have been stupid enough to try to actually break into a house or spray paint one of the houses. But you can bet that if these fuckers are not caught and stopped at this level of of crime, that they will get bolder and start doing even more serious damage.

That’s the problem with criminals. People want to be merciful and give them – especially kids – a second chance. But that doesn’t work. You have to do something to get their attention and make them not want to do it again. Just putting the little fuckers on probation accomplishes nothing other than keeping courts busy and lawyers rich.

With all the shit going on around here, I decided to install new motion sensor lighting around my house. I put two lights at the front door, one at the back door, two over the garage and also one on each of the four corners of the house. They can come on by use of a switch in the hallway, or I can set them to only come on when something moves within 10-15 feet of the house. I went ahead and set them to be very sensitive to even small animals. I would rather have the lights come on a few times unnecessarily because of a raccoon or a fox, than to have them miss showing some ghetto thug cutting across my yard or trying to bust out a window.

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

stupid

This graphic was on a friend’s Facebook wall. It made me laugh because she had just done something incredibly stupid last week.

She had a big fight with her boyfriend and kicked him out of the house. Then she was so mad at him that she hunted him down the next day and did something really stupid. I’m not going to bust her ass for what she did. But if you know her you will find out about it soon enough.

Does Anyone Ever Use Egg Timers Anymore?

My grandparents came over to America from England when they were newlyweds and they kept a lot of their English ways. They always offered a cup of hot tea to every guest, and they ate a lot of typical English foods, like shortbread cookies and soft boiled eggs.

My grandmother used to use an egg timer that she would wind up and set on her stove. It was important to her to have the eggs cooked just the exact right amount of time to be properly set. Its been years since I’ve had a soft boiled egg for breakfast, and just the thought of that made me think back to the egg timer that my grandmother used to have.

Whats for Dinner?

Just got home from work and was so tired that I wasn’t even thinking about what to do about dinner. I was just focused on getting the hell home and away from the job site. I got home and pulled open the refrigerator door and found almost nothing in there that can be nuked or even baked for my dinner.

I think I’ll just order pizza tonight. I haven’t done that in a long time, but I can order two or three and get a discount, then pop them into freezer bags and just pull out a slice or two when I want it over the next week or two.

Snake on a Plane

There was a bizarre movie that came out a few years ago about a couple dozen snakes that got lose on an airplane. I never watched that whole movie – it seemed pretty lame for a storyline and I am not even creeped out about snakes anyway. Some people act so fucking crazy when they see any snake or bug or anything unusual.

But I came to think of this movie because I was listening to some guys who run an airport while sitting at a table next to them at lunch. They were having a big laugh about some guy who flew his small plan into that airport and left it there for a couple of days. Then when he came back to fly it home, he took off from their small field but almost immediately called back to the tower and said he had an emergency.

Turns out that while that guy left his plane for a couple of days at the field, that a snake had come into his plane and made a home inside the plane’s dashboard. When he took off the snake was disturbed and came out from behind the dashboard and tried to get out of the plane. The dumb fuck was screaming into the radio “Emergency! Emergency!” and he turned it around and landed, got out of the plane as fast as he could, and threw himself down on the ground scared to death.

I don’t know what the fuck I would do if a snake came crawling out of a dashboard, but I don’t think I would be screaming like a little girl and shitting myself. What a putz!