Wrong number phone calls should be handled a proper way. If you call my phone by mistake, at least have the fucking courtesy to tell me, Sorry. You have, after all disturbed me. In fact, you have no idea what I might have been doing when you called and I had to stop it to answer the fucking phone. So, at least say you are sorry, and if you are stupid enough to call me right back and call my number by mistake two times in a row, this time you should apologize not only for disturbing me but for also being s STUPID MOTHERFUCKER!
Swamp People Are Some Scary Fuckers
Have you watched that cable show called “Swamp People”? Those guys are some scary weird mother fuckers. Good god – I can’t understand a word those fuckers say except, “That’s an eight footer! That’s an 8 footer!”
I mean, what is it about killing alligators that makes a TV shows? Fuck me – I’m so glad I don’t live down there. Remind me to stay the fuck away from swamps – I’m more concerned about those kind of fucked up people being down there than I am worried about alligators.
Dirty Books for Women
This Fifty Shades of Grey book is really making the news. I finally had to take a look at it while in the store today. I flipped through a few pages. I have to tell you, I was not impressed. The writing was pretty lame and the story just isn’t interesting. I didn’t buy it.
What the fuck do the women like in this book? Are they really liking the book because it talks about kinky sex? Of are they just a bunch of sheep buying the book because it is being well marketed and the talking heads are being paid to rave about it, thus driving up the sales. Has anyone heard a woman actually admit that it is a good book? I have not.
No Bird Shit Yesterday
The next chapter in my bird shit saga is good news. I parked my car on the east side of the building yesterday. There is a lot of activity on that side, because that is where the loading dock is for the whole building. There is constant traffic over there with delivery trucks and moving vans, so birds are less likely to hang around with all that noise and activity.
Just out of curiosity, when I left work I drove around to the south side of the building and noticed that there were several cars parked on that side that had white splotches of bird shit on them. So I think I figured out to park on the other side for a while. I don’t even know what kind of birds these are, but sometimes I see huge flocks of Starlings swarming in the sky. I hadn’t noticed any Starlings lately, but I haven’t been looking for them, either. We don’t really have pigeons around here, although there are some downtown. I wonder what the fuck is shitting on our cars in Cools Springs now?
Car Wash Again
Most of the time my car only needs a light hosing down to keep it clean. I do a spring detailing, and then once a week I run it through the automatic car wash at the gas station. It’s two bucks for a 5 minute hose job.
For some reason, where I parked my car yesterday was a bird poop magnet. When I came out of the office I found white splotches of bird shit all over the car. It wasn’t even under a tree. I have no fucking idea why a flock of birds would decide to fly over my car and just all of them shit on it. There weren’t any cars parked beside it when I got out of the office, so I am curious if they got shit splattered, too – or was it just me?
So this morning I got up early and drove down to the self serv car wash bays and spent a half hour scrubbing my down to get the bird shit off of it. I don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do about parking it in the lot to the office on Monday. Maybe I’ll find a place on the other side of the building.